Tuesday, July 21, 2015

New Top 10 Reasons why Mauritius IS the Best Managed Country in the World

No. 10. “Soit li ‘carry on’ dans la serenite, soit li pran so decision… d’ici la fin la semaine” – but no ultimatum was given – and everyone in the cabinet had an intellect level with known limits, except one.

No. 9. “Ca ministere-la ti capave faire 10 fois, 100 fois plis” – Does it not mean that the PM is satisfied between 1% and 10% by the work carried out by this particular ministry? Can we please have his level of satisfaction for the other ministries?

No. 8. “Zotte mange dans ene l’assiette et zotte faire malpropre dans ca meme l’assiette-la...” -- Surgeon General’s warning: Adding more terms to this sequence or reversing its order may cause serious damage to your health. Please do not try this at home without adult supervision.

No. 7. Dragons to replace koalas as the world’s cutest animals. And Mauritius subscribes to the one-koala policy.

No. 6. In an unconfirmed report, there are apparently plans for Le Reduit to be transformed into a giant nursery to recoup the cost of the renovation.

No. 5. 2 ships bang into one another in the harbour and you learn about it from the Prime Minister and neither from our coast guards nor port master – and people have the nerve to say that our institutions are not working!!!

No. 4. “Chef d’oeuvre de budget” to be hung at the Louvre instead of La Joconde.

No. 3. “The Medpoint accord was crafted in the interest of the country” – No kidding, I thought it was crafted in the interest of 3 people with 2 from the same family.

No. 2. The nation is divided as to whether the PM would disguise himself as a drag queen if he were to be invited to an evening hosted by the local gay community.

And the No. 1 reason why Mauritius is the best managed country in the world is

No. 1. July. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months for Mr. Berenger to organise General Elections. The others are June, January, September, April, November, May, March, October, December, August and February – with apologies from Mark Twain.

This was written end of May 2005. Recall that there were general elections the following July 3rd. You will need to beam yourself back to this period to understand a few of the reasons. Don't think this ever got published.

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