Some History On Its Way

With the departure of Soodhun there's a possibility we might see Fazila Daureeawoo in the front bench of our Parliament. This would open the door for her to become the first female acting Prime Minister. All it will take is for the three ministers that are highest in the hierarchy to be out of the country. And it might happen when President Fakim -- who's been awfully quiet about recent threats to our national unity -- is in the Le Reduit. The odds of Ms. Daureeawoo making history are actually higher as PJ would have to dump Collendavelloo, a huge and growing electoral liability, soon. Very soon.

And if you noticed more history was made last 12 March when for the first time a Prime Minister of Mauritius who attended our flag-raising ceremony at historic Champ de Mars hadn't declared a community in a general elections. It would have been basic poetic justice for this honour to go to SSR the first time the Four Bands replaced the Union Jack. But that was not possible. This didn't distract the team he built from proving Meade wrong. A very tall order.

MK Should Ask Us To Name Five A350 XWBs

Like Qantas did a couple of months ago. But our national airline has ordered 6 of those planes I hear you say. I know. One of them has to be 12.3.68. And has to fly over the Champ de Mars at noon sharp on March 12, 2018.

Mauritius at 50: Getting Ready

Here are some of the things we should do:

1. Bring basic -- very basic -- management back. Like building another reservoir so we can catch more of all the water that falls on our head every year. And of course put more money into fixing leaking pipes. Instead of squandering billions into building new offices because one Minister wants more legroom.

2. Have an A380 fly over Champ de Mars at noon sharp. The peculiar thing about this plane is that it would not have any name. Only a few digits. 12.3.68.

3. New national logo and tagline. Which recognise that we can have the world's best air quality. This will help improve our management. Ask Southwest Airlines.

4. Significantly reduce the 450 amputations that are done every year. We could start by immediately taxing soft drinks more and increasing the number of weekly PE classes in our schools to three. Redesigning the curriculum with the 9-amputations-a-week statistic in mind and by going for noncumulative semesters will also produce a better learning experience. And say goodbye to obese parrots.

5. Reinstate progressive taxation so we grow faster again. And allow us to be more mindful.

6. Tweak our electoral system in a thoughtful way. Without introducing a dose of PR and the dangerous party lists that come with it. A few hysterical Marxists who want to do "autogestion" with our iPhone of constitution won't like it. But that won't prevent us from sleeping tight.

7. Allow kreol as an option in which debates in Parliament can happen. That's the language more than 8 out 10 Mauritians speak at home. Lalit can provide an initial list of unparliamentary words or add an entry on Wikipedia.

8. Schedule Zurnal Televize (ZT) on the first channel at 19h30. Have one reporter posted in each of these three cities: San Francisco, London and Tokyo to help cure navel-gazing.

9. Merge the CWA and CEB into a superutility. To protect us from severe Ministerial delusions. And to go back to our interesting 1996 carbon footprint.

Saving the rest for Mauritius at 500.

A Champ de Mars Like No Other

The one we have in Port-Louis should have a little emphasis added to its name: Champ du 12 Mars. Because for so many of us it was on a twelfth of March that we experienced some of the most intense moments of our existence there.

The granddaddy of all being of course 12.3.68. Because when else do you witness so much heart-stopping drama? First, the Union Jack is lowered. That's enough to get your blood pump to beat irregularly. At least a few times. Then our own brand new flag is raised high. If you are still not dead by then you also -- as a bonus -- get to hear a massive crowd of all kinds of tear-eyed people very proudly singing. Or crying. Some of them uncontrollably. To a beautiful piece of music.

We need to hurry with this one for at least two reasons. One because independent Mauritius will turn 50 in a few years and the other to help us forget the ridiculously bland celebrations for the 40th (a year of ferocious bean-counting -- aka bumper crop) and 45th independence anniversaries (a year when we apparently didn't have enough money to have our own A380 land at Plaisance -- thanks PBB!).

Shouldn't be too hard to get this baby out for this year's celebration.